I'm just going to say it, Parker is fascinated by his penis. Which leads me to say things I never thought I would ever have to say...
"Parker, don't put your wiener in the shower marker cap, please."
"Parker, your wiener does not belong in the empty toilet paper roll."
"It's not going anywhere, quit holding it so much!"
"Parker, we don't stick our hands down our pants/diaper in public."
"Parker, we don't stick our hands down our pants/diaper at the dinner table."
"I need to fasten your diaper, hands off the merchandise."
"Parker! Quit pinching your wiener with my hair straightener!"
"Dude! I don't have one, but if you keep pulling that hard, I'm not 100% sure it won't fall off."
"I don't think you're going to be happy when you hit that with a hammer."
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