Single Ladies Pregnant Version

Innuendo or my dirty mind you be the judge!

I have been reading quite a few children's books to Parker and beginning to think some of these authors are on drugs and/or have dirty minds.

Exhibit A: What drugs was this guy taking? A Golden Book called Uncle Wiggily has a main character called the skillery-scallery alligator who wants to nibble on Uncle Wiggily's ears. The alligator tries to get Uncle Wiggily out of a tree by using his "rough nutmeg-grater tail" to saw down the tree. The other characters devise a plan to scare away the alligator by painting his tail red.

Exhibit B: This author needs a girlfriend...or boyfriend. In a book called Danny Beaver's Secret, Danny wears a tank top and flashy belt. One of the main characters is named Pussy Cat and he borrows her flowers to help him with his secret.

Exhibit C: Maybe I can use this book to teach Parker about child molesters. These are exact quotes! "When you wish to return," he continued, "grip my staff tightly and stand behind me. Close your eyes and think of your own home..." He took the staff and stepped behind the chief. As he did, the boy felt a great surge beneath him...

Seriously, I did not make this stuff up!

Passing on a Life Lesson to the Next Generation

Today I took Parker to the Clerk's Office to meet my old coworkers, then we headed to Juvy to surprise Elaine at her retirement party. As we left Juvy I thought back to the first time my Dad brought me to Juvy (at that time he was the Juvenile Detention Supervisor). So I looked Parker in the eyes and repeated what my Dad had said to me. I explained that bad boys and girls go to juvy when they break the law, so he better be a good boy and if he was a bad boy he would be spending the night there because Mommy & Daddy would take their sweet time picking him up!

Happy First Birthday Ike & Turner!

Ike and Turner are officially a year old today!
Looking back over the pictures I can't believe how quickly they have grown! They have given us moments of laughter, tears and frustration but they are so worth it!

The day we brought them home!


Two months old and already best buddies!


Starting to look more like dogs than puppies.

Naps on the living room floor became a nightly tradition.

Um, Ike I know you like to snuggle but do you know where your head is?

Full grown ...we hope!

I dropped some bacon, unfortunately it appears that Ike's head is too big to fit far enough under the counter to get the last piece!

What a Difference Two Months Makes!

Parker was two months old on July 7th! I actually feel like he has been here longer than two months (but in a good way!) Looking back at the pictures it is amazing how much he has changed in such a short period of time!

2 days old

8 weeks old

Parker's impersonation of Edith Ann

Help Us Name the Boys!

Parker's fur brothers will be a year old on July 11th and Brian and I need to come up with middle names so we can register them with the AKC. The names I call them - Ike "$hithead" Masten and Turner "damnit get down!" Masten aren't very catchy. So any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

If you have never met these two, here are some pictures & info to help inspire you:

Ike and Turner are chocolate labs & they weigh almost 100 lbs
Ike is taller and darker than Turner
Ike is a destructive chewer...no dog toy, stick or house stands a chance
Turner is more aggressive when they wrestle and play
Turner is a digger and a barker/whiner

Don't let these cute puppies fool you, they were already

showing signs of being adorable destruction machines!

All grown up, handsome aren't they!